The Wonder of Foreign Bathrooms


Apologies to all my adoring fans but I have been away for the last week and so have not been able to bring you amazing slices of intriguing yet quite useless bathroom ramblings. But never fear for I have now returned and I have some outstanding rambling’s for you to enjoy.

To start off let me picture the scene (although no doubt you have all been there). You’re away on holiday and you’re all excited and looking forward to a week of relaxing and exploring all the wonders a new country has to offer. You’ve got off the airplane and have just arrived at the hotel. You’ve managed to navigate through the first hurdle of checking in with a person who doesn’t speak a word of your native tongue and your pigeon version of their language has just about succeeded. As soon as you turn around to locate your room you suddenly need the toilet it’s a natural reaction all the stress is gone you’ve arrived and everything is sorted so your bowels decide now is the time to let you know that you need to go. I’m sure everyone has been in this situation at least once if not many times.

So your body is telling you that you need to go then the dread kicks in, you’re in a foreign country what if the toilet is just a hole in the ground. Thankfully for me there was a toilet and the bathroom was wonderful and everything was ding dang doodly fine. Hopefully all of your holiday bathrooms have been fine as well and you haven’t encountered any major problems.

Foreign Toilet

It got me thinking about bathrooms abroad and different cultural changes that can invariably take place. We may automatically think that all bathrooms look, smell and have the same functions as our own native bathrooms. This is where we invariably become unstuck in assuming that

1 Our bathrooms are the correct and only way in how a bathroom should be arranged.

2 That all countries have the same cultural bathroom agreements as us.

3 That all countries have the infrastructure and plumbing as us.

All these combined make us naïve when it comes to experiencing a foreign toilet.

So here are a few tips on enjoying a foreign bathroom and not being surprised or alarmed when you encounter something you weren’t expecting.

Foreign Toilet

Tip Number 1

Research, research, research.

It may seem quite blatantly obvious but research is the best way to find out if you’ll be expecting a hole in the ground and a bucket of water for a shower or expecting a fully functioning power shower and spa bath. Research will also tell you if you can flush toilet paper down the loo or if the country’s plumbing system doesn’t allow this. Research is key my friends.

Tip Number 2

Know the lingo

This again may seem obvious but it is 100% worth mentioning and should be adhered to the last thing you want is pee running down your leg while your shouting toilet at the top of your voice at a bar man or store keeper who shrug and think you want to buy a loaf of bread or a glass of milk. Know the word for toilet and have it on the tip of your tongue it could save you a world of embarrassment.

Tip Number 3

Don’t be scared

If you find out through your research that you are visiting a country that operates on a hole in the ground routine then don’t let it put you off. Remember all the natives use this system and have been for years. You can easily over come your fears and do your business the native way for a week or two.

Tip Number 4

Relax and just enjoy it remember your on holiday.

Well hope you enjoyed my quick tips on travelling round different countries and how to deal with what you maybe faced with bathroom wise. Good luck to you all fellow travellers.

 

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The Great Toilet Roll Debate


Which way to roll the toilet paper from the front or from the back?

Some of you may think that this alternative bathroom blog is full of general bobbins and irrelevant issues that have no relevance to either society or an individual. Well today I am going to introduce a topic that everyone has an opinion on and one that has in the past led to broken marriages, life long friendships ended and even murder.

The great debate is the position of how a toilet roll should be situated with regard to the toilet paper’s accessibility. To help evaluate this debate further I have devised a phrase, the ‘Toilet Paper Delivery System’ or TPDS.  Below is a diagram that illustrates the debate.

As you can see from the diagram there are two positions.

Position A = Under

Position B = Over

If you have laughed or smiled or sniggered at any time since reading this blog then you have drastically underestimated this debate. There have been scientific studies over this debate from a sociological aspect as well as a psychological and philosophical approach. Yet no conclusive result has been attained.

Research has shown that 60-70% of people prefer the over method of TPDS compared to the 30-40% of people who prefer the under TPDS. To provide a broad over view and will discuss what people perceive to be the pro’s and con’s of both over TPDS and under TPDS.

Over TPDS

Pros

Over TPDS is easier to find and see the loose end piece of toilet paper.

Over TPDS reduces the unfortunate accident of knocking your knuckles against the wall when achieving the desired amount of toilet paper.

Over TPDS is generally used by manufacturers to display their loo roll products as patterned wall paper can be more aesthetically displayed.

Under TPDS

Pros

Under TPDS can be said to provide a tidier appearance due to the loose end being hidden underneath and out of view.

Under TPDS has less chance of unravelling if an earthquake were to occur.

Under TPDS also has less chance of being unravelled by small children or pets such as cats or dogs (we’ve all seen the Andrex commercials with the cute puppy).

Each toilet roll position has its own benefits and faults but ultimately it comes down to personal preference and something that only you can decide. Like all great debates such as Vampires vs Werewolves, Pirates vs Ninjas or Cake vs Biscuits this debate will rage on through out all eternity.

As with most of my blog’s I could write more, and I realise I am only scratching the surface of this debate. I will no doubt return to this topic at a later date to delve deeper into this conundrum.

Well I hope you enjoyed this blog and that you haven’t lost any friendships over it. On Friday the fun poll will be this debate so think long and hard and make sure you return on Friday to make your vote.

Friday’s Fun Poll What do you listen to in the shower?


After blogging on the top 5 shower radios earlier on in the week I thought it would be appropriate to continue the theme and ask you all what you listen to in the shower.

There is lots of choice out there with regard to radio stations almost too much choice. There are radio stations for Funk, Garage, Soul, Reggae, Pop, Rock, Metal, Disco, Jazz, Classical, Opera, Rap, Hip-hop, Ska, Dubstep, Dance, Drum and Bass literally every type or form of music is available. Sometimes though you do need to do a bit of searching but eventually you find what you’re looking for.

Shower Image Kings Bathrooms

Maybe you have a fancy hi-tech shower radio that incorporates Bluetooth and are able to stream your own tunes from your mobile or computer and don’t listen to the radio. Maybe you even have a morning playlist that helps to wake you up and get you fully re-vitalised for the day ahead.

With so much choice with regards to music and radio choices and due to everyone’s individual preferences it’s time to have a poll and see what everyone listens to.

Below is a simple poll with a few choices. As always please leave a comment as i’d love to hear from you. You can even suggest the frequency and name of your favourite station so i can check it out. As always enjoy.

Top 5 Shower Radios


So you’ve come to the realisation that you need a new shower enclosure and so you’ve done the right thing and browsed through Kings Bathrooms range of quality shower enclosures to find the best style suitable for your space and style in your bathroom.

You have also been astounded and amazed at the price of your new shower enclosure from Kings Bathroom that you had to tell all your family and friends about the amazing deal. If they don’t believe you then you point them to the new Kings Bathroom You Tube video to prove the amazing styles and prices (conveniently situated below). If they are still not convinced you welcome them round to see your home to see your new bathroom centre piece with a beaming smile.

So you’ve brought and installed your new shower enclosure from Kings Bathroom and saved yourself enough money for a good slap up meal. You’ve also managed to convince your family and friends of this amazing shower enclosure deal and hope that they to will take up the amazing offer.

You then decide that today is the day when you are going to have your first shower in your new enclosure. You drop the towel on the bathroom floor and step in as naked as when you were born, turn the shower on and then you realise ………….you forgot to buy a new shower radio.

Shower radios are brilliant they give you useful information in the morning from the news, weather and travel reports. Plus they provide music for you to dance and sing (usually badly unless your blessed with a voice like Tom Jones or Aretha Franklin).

So to help you have the best shower experience possible in your new shower enclosure here is my top 5 shower radios to purchase.

Top 5 Shower Radios

  1. Steepletone Penguin Shower Radio
  2. H20-100 Power Water Pressure Powered Shower Radio
  3. Microphone Shower Radio
  4. Hipe Waterproof Bluetooth Stereo Shower Speaker & Hands free Speakerphone for streaming Audi and Answering your phone-White
  5. Clatonic DR 814 Shower Radio with Motion Sensor – White

Penguin Shower Radio

  1. Steepletone Penguin Shower Radio

This is a good all round fun shower radio that is ideal for people with a fun sense of humour or for a family with kids. The radio is in the shape of a penguin with a rubber ring and goggles. It has easy to use buttons and requires 3 AA batteries to work and can tune into both FM and MW.

Water Powered Shower Radio

  1. H20 – 100 Power Water Pressure Powered Shower Radio

This is a fantastic shower radio that is truly a work of brilliant innovation. The radio does not need batteries to work as it is powered by the water pressure of the shower. I mean that is very clever plus environmentally friendly and cost saving on batteries.

The radio is easy to install directly onto the faucet of your shower, when you turn the shower on it turns the turbine inside the radio and generates power to run the radio. The radio will also work after the shower is turned off as the turbine also charges up the rechargeable battery inside meaning you can be listening to your tunes while drying off. Easy to use buttons are situated on the front of the radio.

Microphone Shower Radio

  1. Microphone Shower Radio

If you enjoy singing in the shower and I mean who doesn’t, then this is the shower radio for you. The radio is shaped like a microphone with easy to use buttons on the side. There is also a hook at the bottom so when you don’t want to sing into the mic when your favourite tune is playing you can always hang it up. This is defiantly the radio if you are a budding rock or pop star.

Bluetooth Shower Radio

  1. Hipe Waterproof Bluetooth Stereo Shower Speaker & Hands free Speakerphone for streaming Audi and Answering your phone-White

This is the most hi-tech and expensive of the radios listed but it does come with some impressive features that warrant the price tag. The radio is Bluetooth enabled and so you can connect to any other Bluetooth device. This enables you to be able to stream music and even answer phone calls from your mobile while being in the shower. This is defiantly the radio for people constantly on the move or gadget lovers. This radio has easy to use buttons on the front and is available in white or black.

Motion Sensor Shower Radio

  1. Clatonic DR 814 Shower Radio with Motion Sensor

This is a fantastic shower radio that has some great features. The radio has easy to use buttons located on the front of it and a hook at the top but that is not the main feature of this radio. The main feature is that the radio has a built in motion sensor that automatically turns the radio on and off. It also has both AM and FM bands giving you a wide choice of stations to listen to.

Well hope you enjoyed my top 5 shower radios and that you found your perfect companion to compliment your new shower enclosure.

As always please drop me a comment I’d love to hear from you.

Bathroom Olympics


With all this Olympic hype swirling round Great Britain I have been caught up in the hype and am loving it immensely. I have been watching as many different sports as possible and been introduced to new sports and how they work.

So I thought to myself why has no one thought about creating the Bathroom Olympics? I mean the bathroom can be such a fun place that you could invite all your mates round and instead of playing the bog standard board games and usual shenanigans you could all play Bathroom Olympics.

The Olympics is such an amazing astounding event that it manages to bring people from all over the world together in harmony. It’s amazing how sport can play such a key component in bringing people together.

It was with this idea and thought process that I decided it was time to bring everyone close with the Bathroom Olympics. I know what you’re thinking here he goes again on another one of his hair brained crazy ideas, but this time I have struck gold. I truly believe that after you have read the amazing games below that you to will be a convert to the Bathroom Olympics.

I know one or two of these games are going to be hard to judge as personal space maybe infringed upon, but that infringement will no doubt bring people closer together so we can end up being all one big happy family.

To kick the Bathroom Olympic proceedings off there needs to be a Bathroom Olympic pledge just like the real Olympics. You can always amend this to suit your needs or keep it how it is.

 

The Bathroom Olympic Pledge:

In the name of all the competitors taking part in this illustrious and amazing competition I promise that we will respect and abide by all the laws governing this competition. We will have fun, laugh, smile and enjoy all aspects of this competition. We will mock the loser and be envious of the winner. But at the top of this all we will come together in brother and sister unity in a competition of complete and utter pointlessness.

Bathroom Olympics Events

Perfect Temperature

This is probably one of the hardest games in the Bathroom Olympics. The contestant has 10 minutes to run the perfect temperature bath, as no one likes a bath that is to hot or to cold. After the 10 minutes is up the temperature of the bath is measured by a thermometer and the closest to 38 degrees C is the winner. A contestant does not have to use all the allotted 10 minutes if they feel they have reached the achieved temperature. If there is a draw then the contestant who achieved the temperature the quickest is the winner.

Rubber Duck throwing

The contestant sits in the bath tub and has to throw a rubber duck from a minimal distance of one and a half metres into a bathroom basin. The contestant has 3 rubber ducks and scores a point for each rubber duck successfully thrown into the basin.

Soap Juggling

This is a really simple game but is great fun. The contestant has to juggle 3 Bars of soap for as long as possible. The soaps will be placed in a basin full of water before the event starts. The longest time recorded before dropping a soap is the winner.

Splash Back

This is more of the extreme sports and I apologise if anyone is offended but it’s just a bit of toilet humour. Hopefully everyone knows the term splash back but for those that don’t it is the splashing of water hitting the derrière when doing your business. The scoring would be based on surface area wetness.

Towel Drying

The contestant takes a 5 minute shower and has to dry themselves as quick as possible using a standardized medium towel. Marks will be taken off for red marks left after rubbing to hard against the body.

Tap Running

The contestant has to turn on all taps so they are full flowing and have reached the fastest flowing capacity where you can’t turn them any further. Once this is in place the contestant then needs to turn all taps off as quickly as possible until no drops remain.

Toothpaste Squirting

For this event you will need a tube of toothpaste but make sure it is the squeezy tube variety not the pump action toothpaste.

The contestant has to squeeze or push the toothpaste tube in a sharp quick action to see how far they can squirt the toothpaste. The furthest distance attained is the winner.

Bathroom Heptathlon

Takes in all the above events and the highest score after all events is crowned the winner.

 

Well hope you are blown away by the amazing set of games laid out for you all to compete in. So get your friends and family round and enjoy your own Bathroom Olympics.

As always any comments are welcome, maybe you can think of another bathroom game I haven’t thought of by all means let me know.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Friday’s Fun Zombie Apocolypse Poll


Through out this week I have hopefully given you a good grounding in how to survive a zombie apocalypse when stuck in a bathroom in the two part blog (previous blogs Part 1 and Part 2) . I have taken you through weapons, escape route planning, supplies and re-fuelling. For this Friday’s fun poll I thought it would be a good idea to see which bathroom items people are willing to sacrifice.

The scenario is that you have only time to grab one of the items listed in the poll below. Make a wise decision because every item is essential in some perspective including the rubber duck.

Have fun people and by all means please leave a comment as to why you would select a certain item.

How To Survive A Zombie Apocolypse In A Bathroom Part 2


Hopefully you have read Part 1 in this series and are fully up to date with your bathroom survival so far. If you haven’t read Part 1 then go and read it otherwise when the apocalypse happens and you’re stuck in a bathroom you will be zombie chow.

A brief review of how the survival is going. So far you have managed to kill two zombies your neighbour and your flatmates girlfriend. You’ve also managed to keep yourself hidden by employing the turtle technique or have block up the door so no other zombies can get in. Your doing really well and this is where I’m gonna dive straight in with the next stage in our zombie apocalypse survival.

3. Re-fuel

Although this seems like a trivial step seeing as a zombie apocalypse is in full swing but trust me this step is crucial for survival. Let me explain, you are in a panic stricken state your mind is going round in circles trying to comprehend that a zombie apocalypse is happening and your stomach is aching. To calm yourself down and get your self focused you need to preoccupy your brain and stomach with something else. Remember the scenario and remember that you have with you a cheese and ham sandwich and a bag of Haribo. This is the distraction that you need. So munch hard at a steady pace but remember to not eat all the Haribo you will need some left for instant energy later on. You can wash it all down with a drink of water from the bathroom tap. The food will provide energy when making a break for freedom plus it maybe your last meal, you don’t want to be zombie fodder on an empty stomach.

Con – If you’re a vegetarian you may not want to eat the ham in the sandwich.

Haribo

4. RVLB Remembering Visualising Listening Business  

Right, so you’ve calmed down had potentially your last meal and are psyched to take on all zombies in your way. Your adrenaline is through the roof and you are ready to smash zombies up Incredible Hulk style. The only down fall is that your not the Incredible Hulk and therein lies the problem. But you have the unique advantage over zombies that you don’t have a sole craving for brains and can think logically and strategically.

I’ve split this stage of survival up into a handy acronym RVLB – Remembering, Visualising, Listening and Business. Below is how each component is crucial for survival and shows you how you should use your brain rather then lose your brain.

Remembering

The first word in the acronym is Remembering. Remember what I hear you ask? Well fortunately it’s not did you take the bin out for collection or did you remember to pay your credit card bill. These should be the last things entering your head. You have to remember your main aim is survival, and so you need to remember your surrounding area. Your aim is to try to remember playing as a kid in the street and all the little alleyways and roads around you, thinking of where you want to go to for your route to freedom.

Visualising

You could be mistaken for thinking that this is just another facet of remembering and thinking that I’m being over cautious about route planning, but trust me this is not a stage you want to miss out. Once you have remembered and thought of a route you need to literally visualise the route in your head making adjustments of which road and street to move down if you encounter a horde of zombies. Running around like a headless chicken will get you into sticky situations. So visualising as much of your route and compensating for route changes provides you with a higher survival rate. Remember use your brain, don’t lose it.

 Listening

I don’t say this lightly but your ears are literally your best tool for survival end of. If it were a case of I could have a super hearing device or a machine gun during a zombie apocalypse give me the hearing device every single time. Listening for zombie movement is essential for survival your eyes can deceive you into thinking that it’s safe. Just remember the green cross code Stop, Look and LISTEN.

Listening

Business

Lastly on the acronym we have Business. Now there’s no polite way to say this but when you gotta go, you gotta go, it’s as simple as that. Think about it for a moment, you’ve just experiencing fending off two zombies for the first time in your life I’m sure you will need to check yourself. Also you may not feel like you need to go, but you need to give it a try. The last thing you want is that your running as fast as you can and you feel the sudden urge for the toilet it’s not a good situation to be in. Just remember when doing your business you need to be quick and as much as possible quite. The last thing you want is a zombie attack while on the bog trust me you don’t want to die with your pants down. Added bonus is that you can be doing the Remembering, Visualising and Listening all while doing your Business.

Con – Fresh underwear is in your cupboard next door, commando may have to be an option.

Bonus – Going commando gives you a lovely free feeling if you’re into that kind of thing.

5. Supplies

The last section is to fully prepare you for your breakaway to freedom and survival beyond the next few hours. Although you are only in the bathroom, there is key supplies that you need to make sure you pick up.

Toilet Paper

Toilet paper is brilliant, it comes in handy in so many situations such as blowing your nose, cleaning, washing and obviously its main purpose, wiping your bum. So make sure to pack at least one toilet roll as you never know when you maybe in an isolated place needing to go to the loo with no toilet paper available. You can by all means skip this advice if you’re hardcore, and embark on the Bear Grylls / Ray Mears style and wipe your bum with a leaf. But everyone likes abit of luxury so why deprive yourself, take some toilet roll.

Toilet Paper

Toothpaste and Toothbrush

This one is almost self explanatory, no one likes bad breath plus do you have any idea how hard it will be to find a good dentist in a post apocalyptic zombie world. So take them both and make sure you brush everyday.

Razor or Perfume

The final piece of information I am going to give you before making a break for it is to pack either a razor or some perfume. Why? I hear you say. Let me explain, you’ve made a dash for freedom and have succeeded, you mange to bump into other survivors and have found a safe secure location. Everything is all going well. Now the task of re-populating mankind is at hand, the only problem is that no one is attracted to the opposite sex because the men all look like beardy weridy’s and the women smell like gone off milk. This means that no honka donk badonka donk will be going on and the re-population of the human race is in peril. A quick shave or splash of perfume combined with a Barry White or Al Green album can help get things back on track. So for the sake of the human race I implore you pick up a razor or perfume and let those that have died in the zombie apocalypse not of died in vain.

Survival or Zombie Dinner

So we have got to the knife edge of survival or zombie dinner. If you have followed all my instructions then you are now ready to make a break for it. Fully loaded with supplies and a specific route to freedom mapped out in your head. I wish you all the best in your survival. Now take one last listen, pick up your weapon of choice, remove the bathtub from the door or lift it up off of yourself and run like you have never run before. Good Luck

As always if you have any comments or other survival tips please do leave a comment I’d love to hear from you.

How To Survive A Zombie Apocolypse In A Bathroom Part 1


Last week I had the pleasure of having an evening to myself and so decided to watch 28 Days Later. Don’t get mixed up with 28 Days with the lovely happy go lucky Miss Congeniality star Sandra Bullock. I’m talking about the Danny Boyle zombie apocalypse extravaganza. Now if you haven’t seen this film then I can’t suggest highly enough that you rent, download, borrow or buy a copy and have a watch. Granted it is a zombie film and so there is lots of blood and gore which may not be to everyone’s liking but it’s also a story of survival and relationships.

After watching the film I thought I’d do a quick bit of research into how to survive a zombie apocalypse (if it ever were to happen) and I found loads and loads of brilliant information. But then when I looked at how to survive a zombie apocalypse in a bathroom I realised there wasn’t very much information at all. So here is my information on surviving a zombie apocalypse in a bathroom. Enjoy.

First let me set the scene for your survival so you’ve got abit of background knowledge to your survival battle. The scenario is that your next door neighbour has burst through your back door and is looking for anything that moves to start gorging on. That’s right your next door neighbour is a zombie, but its ok you are not too upset because you didn’t really like him because he always played music really late and smelt of cabbage. You have time to grab a bag of Haribo and a cheese and ham sandwich which your flatmate left on the table as you swiftly run up the stairs. As you reach the top of the stairs your flatmate’s girlfriend is coming out of his room and is also a zombie. You assume that your flatmate is dead which is sad so you are now burning with a concoction of vengeance, fear and adrenaline. You see that the only door open and available to move into for safety leads to the bathroom. So with out a thought you jump into the bathroom and lock the door.

So the scenario is set in motion you have two zombies outside and your locked in the bathroom with no where to go. The lock on the bathroom door won’t last long so how do you survive? Well I’ve split survival into a few headings to make it easier to remember.

Zombie

1. Find a weapon

First of all you need to find yourself a weapon. I can not stress this enough a weapon is absolutely key to survival. In this scenario the zombies are trying to break in, they know you are in there and so you need to be able to attack them. Defence is not an option with zombies as they will keep coming again and again until you kill them. Remember its either you or them.

Weapons

Toilet Cistern Lid / Top

This heavy blunt toilet panel is ideal for bonking the zombies on the head and destroying the brain. This should be your first weapon of choice in a bathroom and should remain within arms reach of where ever you move.

Con – The cistern lid / top is heavy and will use a lot of effort up.

Shower Curtain

Although a shower curtain is not exactly a formidable weapon it can be extremely handy. Use the shower curtain to cover a zombies head and face, this confuses the zombie and provides a barrier between the zombie’s mouth and you. You can use the shower curtain to drag the zombie to the ground where stamping and kicking will be most efficient.

Con – Effective for one zombie at a time.

Bathroom Mirror

Hopefully you have a bathroom mirror that is easily removed from the wall. Once removed a mirror can be smashed over a zombies head or broken in to shards to be jabbed in the brain both are effective methods of mirror use.

Con – 7 years bad luck.

Bathroom Towel

A bathroom towel is a simple but useful weapon and one that should not be over looked. Tear the towel into two equal pieces and wrap around hands. You now have a pair of quick home made boxing gloves. Now pretend your Muhammad Ali and swing like a mad man aiming for the head of the zombie. The towel acts as a barrier in case you accidentally punch the zombie in the mouth and get the virus causing you to turn zombiefied.

Con – Good boxing technique needed for efficient zombie death.=

Hair Spray / Deodorant

This is a last gasp weapon and can only be used in desperate situations where no other option is available. Use the hair spray or deodorant as a mini flame throw hold the can up to the zombies face and use a match or lighter just in front of the spray nozzle and hold down the spray button. This is not really a weapon as zombies don’t feel pain but will distract the zombie enough for you to escape and will eventually kill the zombie if it remains on fire.

Con – Matches or lighter needed to work plus strong possibility of burning yourself and causing major injury also potential for making the situation worse.

2. Stop more zombies getting in

So you’ve grabbed a weapon and zonked, whacked, bonked and bashed both your neighbour’s and your flatmate’s girlfriend head in. Success you have survived the first wave of zombie attacks. You have a quick glance down the stairs and you can see a shadow but the zombie hasn’t been alerted to your presence. You realise you can’t get out of the bathroom quickly and quietly so you make the decision to stay for a short while. In addition the bath tub has become lose in the first zombie attack.

Bath Tub Method

Use the bathtub to block the damaged bathroom door making sure it is wedged in tight so no zombies can crawl through any gaps to bite your legs or arms.

Con – potentially quite a noisy manoeuvre so could draw a zombie’s attention.

Turtle Method

This method is somewhat unique and can work extremely well although can also be a tomb for your rotting corpse. The turtle technique is simple, turn the bath upside down and position yourself underneath it. Whilst you are underneath the bath you are well hidden from zombies giving you time to sort out your next move.

Con – If you a prone to sneezing or farting this method is not good for you as any sound will attract zombies plus the smell could be unbearable depending on what you’ve eaten.

Slide and Slip Method

Pretty much all bathrooms will have either bleach or some kind of cleaning product in it, usually located around the back of the toilet or in a cupboard. Simply pour the cleaning product just outside the door and then keep yourself hidden. Any approaching zombies will slip on the liquid and fall over.

Con – Only really works on hard surfaces.

Ok so you’ve killed your first two zombies and you’re well hidden or barricaded in your bathroom. So far so good you’re doing well.

I’ve got another 3 more essential survival techniques and methods to tell you about so come back and visit on Wednesday to complete your training to be fully equipped to take on any potential zombie apocalypse that may or may not happen.

As always please leave any comments in case i have missed any additional weapons or anything.

Friday’s Fun Gender Poll


After a two part blog about explaining how each gender spends time in the bathroom it’s time for you guys to vote on exactly who you think spends longer in the bathroom. Hopefully you have been thinking about it over this week and come to a conclusion and are able to vote.

If you havent had a chance to read either parts of this debate then the links are here Part 1 Males and Part 2 Females.

As always thanks for voting and please leave any other comments.

Gender and the Bathroom Debate Part 2 Female’s


On Monday I briefly delved into the long running debate of why do men take so long in the bathroom? I’m now going to shed some light on why women take so long in the bathroom? This is just so the debate is on an equal playing field ready for Friday’s Fun Poll of who takes the longest in the bathroom men or women.

I will again start off by stating that I am going to be very broad and so quite a few generalisations will be made. Everyone is unique and different and will have their own routines and rituals so please remember a lot of these points are going to be generalisations so please don’t get offended.

So now I’ve covered my back on with the debate.

The difference between men and women is quite significant both physically and psychologically there is no doubting that. Yes men and women can both enjoy sports, reading, films and lots of other common interests but there is lots of smaller points of interest that significantly differ from each gender.

Women in the toilet

These differences can be suggested as being ingrained by social interaction and pressures for example a baby boy is always dressed in blue and a baby girl is always dressed in pink. There’s nothing to say that the colours can be switched around and have a baby boy dressed in pink rather then blue. Hopefully you see where I’m getting at with this point even if I have said it in a confusing muddled way.

Basically I’m saying that society and peer pressure shapes us as people whether we like it or not or whether we admit to it or not. So your there reading this thinking what is this guy chatting about, what does this have to do with women spending more time in the bathroom. Well read on and my pearls of undeniable wisdom will be revealed.

Women spend a long time in the bathroom due to mainly getting themselves ready and comfortable for the day ahead or going out. Unlike men where they mainly use the extended bathroom time to do their business, read and generally relax and escape from the world for while. Women are getting themselves prepared and ready for the world by applying make-up, styling their hair and general self grooming and styling.

women doing make-up

This is the slight fundamental difference between men and women. That women use bathroom time to get ready, although I will point out that the trend is changing. Men are now becoming women and to be honest this annoys me. Men should be men. They are supposed to be a bit smelly and ruff around the edges it’s what defines our masculinity, but more and more men are becoming pooffy lady boys who can’t even hammer a nail into a wall. I apologise though I’m going off on a tangent into another social issue which really annoys me, and needs to be addressed significantly before we all end up becoming self obsessed Asexual beings with no gender differences.

Back to why women spend ages in the bathroom.

Taking this theory of women taking time to get ready in the bathroom this can also be applied when women are out in a social situation with other women. It’s the usual scenario and the mystery of why do women go to the toilet together? This is definitely a situation that men find bizarre and peculiar, but the answer is simple. Women go together to the bathroom to talk. They chat about what’s going on with their lives and if there on a double date they talk about the men. Basically women talk about anything and everything.

In thinking about all of this I came to a final conclusion, that women use the bathroom in the same way as men. Both genders use the bathroom to escape from life for a short while. Although the genders differ in the activities they do in the bathroom, for men it’s reading and doing their business. While for women it’s either talking (in groups) or getting ready (make-up, hair etc). But for both genders the bathroom time is a time to escape from life. I guess this is why when it comes to buying or selling a house the bathroom is such an essential room and can either make or break a sale.

As always thanks for reading and hope you enjoyed it and please leave any comments as I’d love to hear from you.